Schizophrenia is a job for life.

Recently I had conversation with the proud parent of a university graduate. It went something like this:-

"Oh, yes. Peter left Uni last year with a degree in history and now works at Clayson's. He got one of the best results in his year. How is David doing?"

"David? He went into schizophrenia. He's doing very well."

"What!"

"Yes. He's a schizophrenic. He passed all his tests. Did a brilliant practical. He completely smashed the opposition."

"Oh?" followed by a questioning look.

"He really enjoys it. The hours are a bit long but he gets to rest during the day and has a free medical every month. You wouldn't recognise him now. He has really filled out."

"Peter wants to go on to something else next year."

"Oh no. David is well into schizophrenia. He will be doing exactly what he does now in ten years time. Once a schizophrenic, always a schizophrenic. It's a job for life."

Exit stout party.